Unwrapping the Joy: Mom Pressure

I know I am not the only one, but every year I put pressure on myself to create "the best Christmas EVER". I seem to want to top years when the kids were little and make the holiday as magical as it once was, and am increasingly disappointed in myself when that is not the outcome. This year was a hard one, we seemed to run into bad news after bad news and it was hard to get into the holiday spirit let alone stay in the holiday spirit. It has however, made me do a lot of contemplating, including thinking about this pressure we put upon ourselves, and I hate to say it but especially as Mother's. Mom's just want to make the holidays magical, and we try so damn hard, don't we?

We scour the stores for the perfect gifts, we wrap said gifts (even the ones that are awkward shaped), we plan and create holiday events and opportunities to see that magic touch our kids faces just one more time, we shop and make all the goodies (or if you are like me this year you just shop for them- there's no shame in that), and then plan for the big day. Then the big day comes and it's all over so quickly, you wonder just where the day went.

Sometimes the holidays are just plan hard, they come with family gatherings, pressure to get the "perfect gift", work obligations, and for many they are a sad time of year that remind us of those we have lost along the way. This year has been a learning year for me, we lost our dog, two weeks before Christmas, it was very quick and very devastating for us all. I spent the weeks up to the day making homemade meals and hand feeding her, which took away a lot of any spare time that I had. Don't get me wrong I would do it again in a heartbeat but it made it difficult to get into the holiday spirit and certainly added additional emotions around the holidays. On top of this I managed to ruin the Elf on the Shelf for my daughter by a mis-sent text message. It has however taught me to go easy on myself; when I get into my head about not doing enough and Christmas not being perfect for the kiddos, I remember that it's alright. What they remember is a mom who tried, a mom who went out of her way through a tough time to still wrap gifts, play Christmas Music and make gingerbread houses (even though they were a Christmas eve, eve gift) and all of this is perfectly all right.

I may have boughten all of my Christmas cookies, and treats this year, we may have changed the plan from a traditional turkey dinner to a raclette dinner, I may have gotten really sloppy with my wrapping near the end (probably since the beginning), I may have lost my temper a few times, and my husband may be working Christmas Eve leaving me with the "late night tasks", but in the end I can confidently say I have done the best with what I have this year. I heard this quote the other day (and forgive me because I don't know the source) but it essentially said that if you only have 40% to give and you give that full 40% you have essentially given 100% of what you have to give and that is more than enough, really that is great, because you gave it all you had.

So cheers to all of us mom's (and sorry I am sure there are a lot of dad's out there doing this too, so I don't mean to exclude you) making Christmas as magical as they can, and thank you for giving all you had to give and doing the best you could. You make Christmas magical and you deserve to be celebrated. So to you I raise my coffee cup (never you mind what's in it, remember no judgement here) and I salute you, to making this Christmas the BEST EVER!

With love and light,

Leah